Submitted by Katie on Mon, 03/08/2010 - 9:00am
Humans have a terrible time sorting out in here from out there. This was best expressed by Yasutani Roshi in one of my favorite quotes: “The fundamental delusion of humanity is to suppose that I am here and you are out there.”
Submitted by Katie on Thu, 03/04/2010 - 7:08am
I rarely issue suggestions about what not to do. This problem, though, requires a strong DON’T. If you adopt this plan, you’ll eliminate a huge source of relationship conflict and liberate lots of free time. You might even increase your likeability quotient. If you are interested, read on.
Submitted by Katie on Mon, 03/01/2010 - 7:42am
When you take 100% responsibility you stand and interact as a whole person who sees others as equals. You get to weave your creativity with others and co-create. When you don’t you get to play on The Triangle.
Submitted by Katie on Thu, 02/25/2010 - 2:08pm
I’ve spent almost forty years of being present with people in their transformation journeys. And this phrase, “but I thought I’d gotten rid of that,” topples people’s sense of progress more often than any other. People seem to experience their themes as adversaries that they conquer and bury, tada. Then when the issue re-emerges, they think they’ve failed, or that “working on themselves” has failed (that last one may actually be true).
Submitted by Katie on Fri, 02/19/2010 - 9:35am
Have you ever had this happen? You’ve been doing lots of stuff to enhance your relationship and out of the blue your partner says, “You just don’t appreciate me very much, do you? I certainly appreciate you more than you appreciate me!” “Wait a minute!” You say. “I just finished (fill in the blank)--that doesn’t count?!” Then a heated exchange of who feels least appreciated ensues.
Submitted by Katie on Tue, 02/16/2010 - 10:42am
I appreciate so many things I’ve learned from living with Gay. One skill that pops up repeatedly is what we call closing the gap. What is that, you may be asking, and what’s in it for me? Well, read on.
Submitted by Katie on Thu, 02/11/2010 - 4:40pm
Of all the principles we explore, taking healthy responsibility and the positive impact that can have on the quality of your close relationships and circles of connection seems to create the most pushback. Some people jump right in and start owning their experience and creating a positive difference in their worlds.
Submitted by Katie on Sun, 01/10/2010 - 2:39pm
“What if I want to change and s/he doesn’t?”
“What if I tell the truth and everything falls apart?”
“What if you make an agreement and the other person doesn’t follow through?”
Submitted by Katie on Sat, 01/02/2010 - 1:15pm
Lucy is fourteen now and in the regal maturity of her life. Over the years we’ve been deeply interested in what wants to happen for and with her. From that curiosity we have organically evolved several rituals that we all find deeply nourishing. Some practices have fallen away, and some have evolved into even sweeter dimensions.
Submitted by Katie on Thu, 12/17/2009 - 10:37am
Most people have had their preferred rhythm of moving through the world messed with. Meanderers got prodded, fidgeters jerked into line and most of us told to sit still to learn. In our relationships, most partners experience that one person waits, and the other is waited for. When you walk with friends or your mate, how do you find your true pace? And how do you blend your pace with another?
