"I consider Gay and Kathlyn to be my teachers." -John Bradshaw
Moving Through Conflict
A paradigm shift has been quietly occurring over the last several years that holds great potential for resolving personal, relationship and cultural conflict. And it’s come from an unlikely place: dance. You might have noticed (as I certainly have, with hands-clapping delight) how many commercials now feature wild dance moves, group movement, and unusual boogying in cars at stoplights, elevators and boardrooms.
This shift away from talking heads has made me totally delirious with bliss, since one of my lifetime goals has been for movement to be so woven into daily life so that seeing lots of people dancing and grooving is no big deal.
And of course there’s the enormously popular Dancing with the Stars television show. Many people love ballroom dance, and my theory is that they love the structure that they can follow and feel the joy of moving together. Gay and I have always enjoyed more freeform dance, the kind where we put on music and move the way we feel. Structure can come from the outside (rules, games, agreements) and/or from the inside (knowing and following your authentic body map). Both are great. Throughout history movement and group dance have bridged these inner and outer worlds, so we’re linking to our basic social structure again in a new way—ah, evolution.
We weave movement throughout our seminars so that people can have a whole-body, whole-brain experience of the vital principles we explore. For example, to hear how much difference taking healthy responsibility can make may register for a few minutes. In contrast, imagine engaging in a movement activity where contact, moving with and feeling your weight make all the difference between creating and falling over. Our participants report that those experiences change neurons and their choices going forward.
And then there’s krumping. This extravagantly athletic, competitive dance form has been saving lives and connecting urban cultures for a couple of decades now. It originally evolved as an alternative to street violence. I would rather witness a dance-off than a shoot-out any day, and krumping allows the inner life of former gang members and urban tribes to be fully expressed and appreciated. I would love to see senators and world leaders bring their moves to a summit where feelings take form in movement and involve whole brains in resolution. That would be a video worth circulating.
How can you turn your feelings into a gesture or movement today? One simple, powerful action is to sculpt or paint your experience in the space in front of you, letting as much of your body move as you wish. Open space, resolution and new creative opportunities arise with ease. Let me know other moves that have created ease and connection in your relationships.
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